A WHITE Perspective ... on RACE by Amanda!

Last night, President Obama gave his State of the Union Address which has left me enlightened this morning.  Hopefully this enlightens you too.

Amanda was a random stranger who is WHITE. She found this blog when I first started in 2007, now she is a friend. I had done this post on 'cocktail rings', and she was kind enough to email me, telling me of her love for cocktail rings. Also complimented me on how colorful this blog was and told me about her passion for photography. Soon enough, she was my friend from the Carolinas. We emailed each other back and forth, updating the other about our respective family life.  Somehow 'though, we lost contact, don 't even know how. Until one day, I went hunting for her blog and was able to reconnect with her.  So as not to lose contact with her, I added her to Facebook. I warned her that my language was pretty colorful too.  I teased, if she could accept that about me, then we'd be ok.  LOL!

My personal Facebook is my platform, apart from my colorful language, the potty mouth, I am very opinionated and quite frankly, I don't hesitate to say how I feel about anything on Facebook. In fact, I have more respect for those who use it to express themselves in any way.  I dislike those who stay mute while observing and taking it all in. I have plenty choice words for those types; COWARDS, NOSEY, SELFISH, etc.  You know the types who may not necessarily like you ... but will not delete cause they don't have the nerve to do so!

Amanda, on the other hand shares her life with me. Yet, never hesitates to 'like' the music videos I post or comment on my pictures. She respects my tangents about RACE ISSUES in the United States or what ever my issue might be, any day of the week.

This comes to mind ... One day, I was looking out my window and saw my neighbors in an all white group of friends.  There were at least 10 white people. I had issue ... why not one friend of another race?  My feeling was there would be no way if I'm in a group of 10 or more people that it would be all black. I think I went on to say ... "white people say they have black friends but would not dare invite them into their homes." Of course, I posted my complaint to FB. Amanda said I had given her something to think about. I loved her then for having the courage to admit that. 

Four years later, Amanda and I have one more thing in common. On December 24, 2011, both her grandson and my son were born 2 hours apart. We're forever bonded!  I can hear us wishing the other Happy Birthday and sharing birthday pictures, in the years to come!


Like every morning, Facebook has become like the habit of clearing the mail or having that cup of Joe, or reading the paper.  It's a MUST!  It's just that I'm on it 20 hours a day!

A  St.Lucian friend of mine, Cameron who is in the US Army and located in South Korea, posted this comment from a sorority sister of his on Facebook which I reposted: 

Me: Ohh to wake to this, thought provoking but TRUE. Thanks Cameron:

"The Obama spending comparison to the past few Presidents HAS to be about race." Well, as I replied I reiterate here, YES, it is about RACE even more so since the election of the first Black President. For some reason every other ethnic group that has been oppressed is allowed to remember, celebrate surviving, even receive reparations and public apologies and NO ONE says anything; often the larger public celebrates/shares in the observance activities. Why is it a problem when African Americas speak up or speak out on what are obviously actions and behaviors and treatments based upon our race? (No I am not responsible for the media exploited failures of SOME members of my race…just as I do not equate to abilities, behaviors, or potential of my Caucasian neighbors from Appalachia regions or the trailer parks to other Caucasians-so do not lump all African Americans into one narrow descriptor) ... Just as holocaust survivors are often revered and honored…just as Japanese-Americans are allowed to remember, reflect, and honor the time they spend in internment camps…so should African-Americans/Black People be able, encouraged, and supported when we call others to reckon about what we have survived? NO other ethnic group was held in bondage of racial servitude for more than 200 years! Human cruelty is wrong no matter who it is done to. I will NOT BOW MY HEAD OR APOLOGISE FOR BEING PROUD OR DEFENSIVE OF MY PEOPLES ACHIEVEMENTS! We have come over a path that with Blood has been watered. Out of the gloomy past till now I stand at last!!! I am proud!!!...................Thank you Soror."

She left these comments, after the post above:

I was born and raised in the "dirty south" 45 minutes away from where Dr. King was assassinated and also where the actual major civil rights movements took place. I was born in 1970, and luckily by the time of my generation a lot of major change had already taken place. 

Growing up, I went to school with people not the same color as I because integration had just taken place, but for us kids outside of school and it's related functions segregation still remained in the social environment. White kids didn't or couldn't go to black kids houses and black kids couldn't or didn't go to white people's houses. 

I wasn't taught anything, but the messages I received were that black people were not as clean and were somehow inferior...we didn't associate with "them." I remember before I actually started school, I was in a convenience store with my father and this little girl about the same age as me hurt my feelings when she stuck her tongue out at me. At that time, I was too young and inexperienced (for lack of a better word) to understand why she stuck her tongue out at me. Still to this day it hurts when I recall that childhood memory because for me I didn't see her color, but she did see mine. So, those messages that I received afterwards reflected back to that little girl sticking her tongue out at me that black people were really "bad." Twisted I know, but the truth nonetheless. 

If it wasn't for integration of the school system already being in place by the time I started to school I would have never had any other social experiences to help change the messages that I received that was reinforced by what happened that day in the store with my father, and I am truly thankful for that! 

All thru those school years I realized that black people were not bad. I had made black friends at school they liked me and I liked them, and I thought that little girl at the store just didn't like me for some reason. I am still friends with some of them since kindergarten. 

Growing up in the south with racial tensions going back generations before and leading up to the civil rights movement was extremely confusing to its children black and white because we were the innocent ones! It is and must be OUR responsibilities that this doesn't happen again to OUR children! 

The other message that I received was that Dr. King was a troublemaker and that there was always an aversion to the mention of him or the sight of him. So for a long time I associated that the reason why was because he was black, but the black friends I had made in school I did not associate them with Dr. King, it was so confusing! I saw glimpses on TV about the civil rights movement. I saw masses of black people blocking roads and interstates, and fighting, and then it showed them being sprayed with fire hoses and being attacked by dogs along with the messages I had received of Dr. King being a troublemaker and they were being troublemakers too blocking interstates etc. So it was easy to explain away as they were getting what they deserved for causing trouble. But I didn't think all black people were "bad" or troublemakers either...it was so confusing. 

Until years later when I actually watched a documentary on the civil rights movement and I saw that same footage again, except this time I felt the anger at how they were being attacked/treated and the hurt and compassion I felt overrode the fact that it was actually our damn government attacking them! Then it all fell into place for me. You damn straight I would have blocked the roads, the interstates, and marched on Washington and anything or anywhere else I could have done! I would have fought! I also have a tremendous amount of respect for Dr. King! He went up against a GIANT and was NOT afraid because he knew he was right for doing so! Because what they were doing was WRONG in every sense of the word. 

Dr. King also made me realize that what he stood up for and took a strong stand against for his people because it was happening to them. Dr. King also stood up for all the races on this earth because if it can happen to one race it can also happen to other races! And it has, just look at the history! 

Integration starts with us. We must pull together what has been torn apart by our government our people and our selves, but mainly I think it's the government and the biased ass media! 

And Nyree you are so right in every sense of the WORD that people/races who have been directly affected by such atrocities have every right to reflect and remember and also speak out about what the pain and struggles they endured! Just like my prejudice History teacher in college who I ADORED said history has to be told because it's a part of the fibers of every being and to leave one part out you just can't do!

I ADORED my prejudiced ass history teacher because of the value of truth he held so dear! And that the truth must be told and be crystal clear! And history should never be hidden or parts taken away! That's why I loved him so much because he was REAL IN TRUTH! 

Ny, I didn't mean to take up your entire status, but I just had to share what it was like and how horrible it was and in its own way affected each and every one of us ... if people will just only admit the truth.


Prior to starting this post, I had not read Amanda's entire comments on my FB page. 'Though, I did let her know, "@Amanda ... looking forward to reading. So glad you sharing with us. Anyway in the middle of feeding Nikail ... will read soon!" 

I wrote this post, and then read her comments. By the time I returned to my Facebook page, Amanda had left this comment on my wall, "Thanks for you sharing and the other shares as well. Kisses to Nikail and (((HUGS))) to you."  This proves I spoke the truth about Amanda!


While I combed her hair and listened to the President's address last night my daughter made the following comments which left me in awe, "He's teaching everybody like Martin Luther King did. He's changing the rules!" Ava-Sol was involved and said "He's right!" when President Obama said "Don't let other countries beat out Americans." LOL!


  1. Girl sipping and reading your piece on A White Perspective...on Race by Amanda....EMOTIONALLY MOVING piece Ny! Thank you to your friend for being honest. Most would not admit this because then they would have to be accountable for their thoughts, feelings & actions...however unpleasant it may be...if only more people would take the step to educate themselves on the history of the black race...not only in America but all over the world.... there would not be such a divide..but I guess every movie has to have a villain.

  2. Good post from Amanda. Ava-Sol's comment makes me ponder if she can get it what the hell is wrong with the rest of America? Ok let me not speak for America just the majority of Miami for the time being, who seem to be leaning towards Newt. And might I just say I think anyone who votes for Newt is a moron! Anyway, thanks for the post Ny, I don't get on here much but when I do u keep it interesting.

  3. I was so caught off guard. Just did not expect that either. I am happy she shared!

    When Ava-Sol said that it did strike a chord! 'Cause exactly at 5, she sees s/thing!

  4. I really am speechless right now with so many more thoughts and memories that generated through out the day after today's post and now this...I don't know what to say after a long days work all I can say is much love and respect to you Ny and your family<3

  5. Lisa,
    So true!! Most still will not admit because they are afraid of the integration that would take place within themselves. It's also because they have come to believe and beliefs are strong even in ignorance. The three b's beliefs, bondage, and blockages...sometimes it just won't open and stays closed hence the bondage, nothing goes in (blockage), and the same comes out (beliefs.) There is no room/energy for the thinking process to emerge because bondage and blockage are too busy protecting beliefs.

    Believing in something or someone or some cause, etc is good, but why not with an open mind as well??

    To sum it up with Dr King's words one of my favorite quotes...
    I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. This is why right, temporarily defeated, is stronger than evil triumphant.
    ~ Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

  6. Thanks Janine and a good post from Nyree as well, and ditto for what you said.

    @Nyree I didn't mean to catch you off guard. Usually I don't have the time to say what I am thinking thinking nonetheless, but that particular facebook status you posted had so much meaning I had to take the time and then rush to work haha.

    The one thing that I meant to add is I am proud to be from the South, I am proud of the black race I am proud of Dr King, and I am even proud of the messages I received because if that didn't happen then I would not have been able to help change those stereotypes of my people that has/had been passed down from the generations before.

    One of the things that hurts me the most is having seen on TV black people hanging by a rope from a tree while a white mob stood underneath the sadness of their swaying bodies. I am not proud of those white people because of their cruelty and complete lack of empathy, and because of the severe tarnishment they caused to my race the color of my skin. I think of the innocent muslims who I empathize with.

    This also makes me think of the Holocaust and how Hitler's supporters felt so justified in carrying out his plan of unspeakable horrors with absolutely no empathy or remorse...absolutely unbelievable!! and that is what Hitler counted on.

    I was almost an agnostic almost so close to atheism at one time, but since then I do believe in the power of good and in the power of evil. Some people refer to evil as the Devil or Satan, and I do believe that Hitler and his supporters who carried out his plan were the Devil and that Hitler was Satan! To me there is just no other way around it.

    To get out of this and off your blog and to work...Music! The blues originated in the fields of the Mississippi Delta, which is a drop (literally and figuratively)right outside of Memphis. When the black people were slaves then sharecroppers (I come from a family of sharecroppers myself) picking cotton by hand in the deep humid hot of the south to make it through they would sing about their troubles........the rest is history! It spread and now the section of I40 I live on between Memphis and Nashville is appropriately named Music Highway...it's what connects us all!

    And little Ava-Sol she is appropriately named because she is a very bright ray of sunshine!

    Peace out...